Saint Patty's Day

Today was a really good day. Nothing remarkable happened...it was just...nice. I forgot what day it was so I didn't purposely wear any green. In the afternoon the fog cleared up and the weather turned perfect.

Steve invited me over to dinner at the caf, which was awesome A) it's free food B) you run into a lot people, and I miss that social aspect. Although I do love living off campus, I seem to lose a bit of the social involvement of college. I rarely pass by the front lawn anymore and I miss that.

Natalie came over tonight and we watched Unbreakable (if you haven't seen it, watch it!). It's one of M. Night Shyamalan's first movies, and is one of the best. Plus I got to watch it with a great friend, one I hadn't hung out with in while, and it was wonderful.

One of my teachers, Dr Cronk, asked me if I would be willing to be a paid tutor for her students in her IT 280 class, and I said yes, definitely! I will be able to be acting as a tutor during my regular lab hours, and will get paid even if students don't show up for help. So basically I should be making double the money for sitting in a computer lab! This is exciting because I need to make up the money I lost during break! Also Spring Sing is coming so I'll be able to make the money by being on run crew so that's nice!

Now it's 12:30 am...and I still have 4 and a half chapters I have to read out of a book by 2:00 tomorrow. I learned about it on Monday, and had to run and buy the book at the bookstore. Fortunately, the book is easy to read and it seems like it'll make some pretty powerful points. The book is "The Life You've Always Wanted" by John Ortberg. I'm excited about reading it all, I just wish I wasn't under pressure to read it.

So I better go do that. Bye! :)

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Almost spring break!

One of my midterms was pushed to the week after spring break!

I got a package from home, which contained:

• A card
• A check for the money I got for my jeep
• Cooking spices
• Homemade orange cinnamon bread
• Homemade molasses crinkles cookies (my favorite!)
• Glow sticks!! (from sister)
  

All of which has made the day pretty awesome so far...plus today was a really pretty day, even though it was cold.

I can't wait for spring break! It's going to be fun. I can't wait to go jet skiing again!

I watched "She's The Man" last night (with Amanda Bynes) and loved it.

I have three reports on professional children's theatre reports to write by tomorrow...I've already got one mostly finished.

My group project for my IT capstone class is going pretty well...we're trying to get at a good stopping place before spring break. We're now to the point where we're going to be working a lot with HTML and PHP, which I like doing and am good at, but for the rest of the people in my group PHP and HTML doesn't come as quickly, but they're learning so we're making progress!

Lets see...I think I might actually splurge tomorrow night and spend $3 to see Taken at Searcy Cinecrud 8...

Well...that's an update on my life! I know you're all enthralled to read about it.

Lovers, keep on the road you're on
Runners, until the race is run
Soldiers, you've got to soldier on
Sometimes even right is wrong

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i'm ready

to like someone again

someone i can like without feeling guilty

or hopeless

i'm not desperate for a relationship

i'm relatively satisfied being single

but i want to know it's possible

that i can like someone

with her liking me back

so i'm ready

for the feeling that comes with the unknown

the pleasant nervousness

the quickening pace of my heart

when i'm around her

now i'll play the waiting game

to see if it's possible

to open those feelings and let them run free

waiting for the girl that catches my fancy

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No freezing rain NO

I think I let the weather affect my mood too much.

I'm mad at myself. I feel like I have been making too many compromises, and this needs to stop.

I've been feeling really off lately...well, pretty much this whole semester (what there has been of it.) There's a part of me that has really wanted to not be here at Harding. A part that wants to move on. Go out into the world. Get a job. Start a new life.

I have found myself resisting relationships; wanting to distance myself from friends because, for some reason, I think that once I leave Harding next year that it will be goodbye forever. And thus why get closer to people when it will just make saying those goodbyes harder?

I was studying in the Heritage lobby between rehearsals tonight, and Tessa walked by and sat down and we started talking. Because I was pondering this right before she came, the conversation led here. As I was voicing the above feelings to her...I realize how ridiculous they were (thanks Tessa...right time right place.)

If I live my life hoping to move on so as to avoid the hurt that comes with it, then what's the point? God can only use me when I allow him to use me in every situation. So I am going to purge these pessimistic thoughts, and instead live and cherish every moment, every relationship, every situation.

One of my favorite quotes of all time is from the movie Gladiator. As Maximus rallies his troupes and prepares them to charge into battle against the barbarian horde, he closes his speech saying:

"Brothers, what we do in life, echoes in eternity."

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Bittersweet Day

It's remarkable how things can turn around so quickly. I woke up this morning looking forward to spending the day with Eric and Ryan, a couple of my best friends from New Mexico (they drove up last night to visit me for a day). I was on top of the world.

...and then life smacked me in the face.

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odd

So I finished reading the first book in the Twilight series last night, and I can't wait to read the others! But I'll probably have to wait till I get to Harding to borrow the next one. Anyway, since I finished my "casual" reading I opened up my Bible to read before I went to bed, and I randomly opened up to Galatians 5. Verses 13-17 were very interesting in light of what I had just been reading, and verse 15 was almost too ironic: "If you keep on biting and devouring each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other."

The coincidence made me smile. :)

On a completely different note, I got my mom various soaps from Bath and Body works for her birthday over the summer. One of the scented soaps I got her was "Sensual Amber" because I like that scent a lot. BUT I like it on girls only. She keeps it in the guest bathroom and I just absentmindedly used it when I washed my hands...I have got to remember to NEVER use it again. Because it is a very feminine and...idk...attractive aroma to me...and its awkward to have it on my own hands. I need to go wash my hands with some other soap just to get it off!

It is 46 minutes into Christmas for everyone on the East Coast. I better get to bed and get those sugar plums dancing! Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

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day of rest? ha!

I haven't updated my blog in a while...I'm sorry. I've been quite busy. I had a 2-hour managerial finance test today, 4 quizzes due, a read thru for Megan's show, and 2 group project meetings.

That's a lot to do in one day...on a Sunday no less.

I think by Thursday though I should be done besides finals! Almost there!

In case you don't know, Kevin and I officially have an apartment now. I believe the number is 125? Anyway, it's below Jordan and Matthew, right across from Kaity, and near the Colvins. It's gonna be great!

Bad news: my iMac as a verticle line of pixels all the way down the screen that are messing up. This is very upsetting. It doesn't keep me from seeing anything, it's just annoying. Also, I believe I have some sort of cut back in my throat...this developed Friday night. It has made every meal since then torture...it kills to swallow. And it kinda hurts to talk so if I'm talking funny, that's why. I hope it goes away soon!

Not much of an update...but it's something. Anyhoo...I'm gonna get ready for bed...i hope to get 5 hours of sleep before I wake up early to finish working on one of the projects.

I have 2 presentations and one skit for tomorrow; please pray that they go well!

...it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...everywhere you go ;)

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